Roethlisberger to Obama: 'This Was for You'

San Francisco Bugle Examiner
"News Under a Microscope"
Tracy Gallagher

For those who like this satire, buy Matthew Avitabile's book, The Real History of World War II.

Tampa, Florida- In a show of change from the norm, Ben Roethlisberger, the Quarter Back of the Super Bowl champions Steelers, gave his thanks directly to the President.

"I'd like to thank my mom and dad and God," Roethlisberger said. "But I can't forget our new President Barack Obama; he showed the country that we can achieve anything. Thank you, this victory was because of you too." When asked his feelings on John McCain, Roethlisberger asked, "Who?"

The Pittsburgh Steelers, who won Super Bowl XLIII 27-23, defeated the Arizona Cardinals in a last minute drive that ended in a Steelers touchdown. "This all is like a dream," said Wide Receiver Hines Ward. When asked about Roethlisberger's comments, Ward responded that "Ben is an excitable guy, but he says what he believes."

Asked after the game about his feelings on the game, Arizona's QB Kurt Warner said, "The game doesn't matter. I just thank God that I am able to do what I love and love what I do. Ben and the Steelers are a great team, and they were just better than us today."

"I'm just sorry we let John McCain down," Warner said, jogging towards the Cardinal's locker room. -Bugle Examiner

Steelers Win Super Bowl with Crap Call

In a clear pass attempt, referees signaled "fumble" as the clock wound down. The fumble, an incomplete pass by the Cardinals' Kurt Warner, was not reviewed, and thus the Steelers have won Super Bowl XLIII. I like the Steelers, I like Polamalu, but that was worth another look; it deserved to be overturned. What a waste of such a great game to be decided on a crap call that wasn't even reviewed. If I new that it would end like this, I wouldn't have wasted my time watching the game at all. And I love football.