Joe's Babe of the Week

Joe C. has another smokin' hot babe for our vast internets audience. Calm down, lads, it's right below.

This Week's Babe:
Janeane Garafalo
Janeane used to have a career, but she still has a career in foxiness. She used to be a comedian, but for some reason, no one was laughing. Sporting her trademark "Gary Hayes 1950's glasses," this hot babe can stare me up and down.
Who can forget her great performance, including her own death, in Team America: World Police (the greatest movie ever). Even in doll form, she raised my strings. Yeah, she's out of work because she has no talent, but the talents under her shirt is all I need.So Janeane, keep unemployed, I'll hire you in an hour. Call me at 1-800-JOE

Joe's Hotness Rank: 8.5/10.0 shotgun shells to the face (see Team America)

Another Self-Important Celebrity: Obama's Awesome, Dude

Ashton Kutcher, while also in That 70's Show and Punked, is best known for his Nikon commercials. The young actor has taken the bold stand of agreeing with almost everyone around him and smiling politely.

Kutcher even has written a column in the Huffington Post declaring his support for-- you know, stuff:

Four years ago I sat in a hotel room with Israel's Head of State, then former Prime Minister Shimon Peres, where he proceeded to tell me what he felt made America a great country. He said that throughout history America, more than any other nation, has supported itself and consistently extended itself to other countries in need without looking for anything in return. I bit my lip as I thought about our national pursuit of Middle Eastern oil and how much more we could be doing as a country for so many resource depleted nations. I kept my retort to this gracious offering to myself and accepted it as a political offering of good will.

Kutcher met Shimon Peres? What the hell is that about. And he's going to talk him down, one of the most respected diplomats in the world. Give me a break.