Hey, Who's Interested in Going to North Korea?

While following a link from LGF I was able to get to the official North Korean tourism webpage. Now I know that you're thinking "Why does North Korea need a tourism page? Doesn't everyone already know it's a workers' paradise?" But you can still see the awesome on their page.

While on the site, I noticed that there is an upcoming trip for those interested in visiting the DPRK-- except for those with American passports. I also read the undisputable fact that the South wants to reunite with the North, but a pesky 'wall built by the Americans' and 40,000 US troops keep it from happening.

This is not to mention North Korea's booming export business. Did you know that the North has a car company called Peace Motors? Seriously. And on that list there was not one mention of nuclear or rocket technology. What a shame.

And naturally, to show how great it is, they also show a picture from one of their sweatshops! Funny, though... I didn't see any pictures of people eating-- although North Korea must have a bitchin' ping-pong team.

And if you need some tunes for your I-Pod, feel free to listen to all of the Stalinist anthems your little capitalist, baby-killer heart desires.

Also included are biographies of Kim Jong-Il and his father, the late deity Kim Il-Sung. Maybe Kim is just ronery vis a vis Team America.

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Quote of the Day

I'm so ronery.

-- Kim Jong-Il


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Joe's Babe of the Week

Dr. Joe, your certified doctor of love, has arrived in our studios in scenic Burbank, California, fresh off of a gig on Jay Leno. Let me just say, there's no joking about these babes! Dr. Joe will be on Oprah tomorrow, 4:30 pm, don't miss it!

This Week's Babe:
Susan SarandonFirst off, we must surely mention the most important feature that everyone notices when they look at this starlet: her massive teeth. Her teeth stick out nearly a foot and are soft and white. These massive tooth puppies might just blind the unexpecting.
Doctor Joe first learned of this beauty when she played a role in Team America: World Police. In that film, she surely deserved five Oscars, especially for her brilliant death scene. I needed tissues when she died, and not because I was crying!
So rent a movie with her in it and make sure to let the dogs out! Woof woof!

Joe's Death Scenes: 9.0/10.0 Standing Coffins

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Joe's Babe of the Week

Joe C. has another smokin' hot babe for our vast internets audience. Calm down, lads, it's right below.

This Week's Babe:
Janeane Garafalo
Janeane used to have a career, but she still has a career in foxiness. She used to be a comedian, but for some reason, no one was laughing. Sporting her trademark "Gary Hayes 1950's glasses," this hot babe can stare me up and down.
Who can forget her great performance, including her own death, in Team America: World Police (the greatest movie ever). Even in doll form, she raised my strings. Yeah, she's out of work because she has no talent, but the talents under her shirt is all I need.So Janeane, keep unemployed, I'll hire you in an hour. Call me at 1-800-JOE

Joe's Hotness Rank: 8.5/10.0 shotgun shells to the face (see Team America)

Listen to Phil Hendrie

Phil Hendrie's one of the neatest radio talk show hosts in the country. He has a sharp sense of humor and seems to enjoy offending his audience in order to make them laugh. He's not crude like a lot of them (Skippy and Frank), but he's intelligent and able to talk intellectually.

Check out his site at www.philhendrieshow.com and try and hunt down some of his bits off the internet. It's comedy gold and you'll be happy you did. Phil Hendrie was even in Team America: World Police. He was the Chechen terrorist and INTELLIGENCE. He also played a role in the NBC show Teachers.

You can also find streaming audio of his site every night (or audio archives if you need them). So look, and get laughing.

Celebrities to Make Us Regret Electing Obama at His Own Inauguration

Well, as if the nation doesn't need anything else on its hands. Recession, war, the World Champion Philadelphia Phillies... and now this?

Apparently a bunch of "really smart" celebrities are going to celebrate the fact that they finally jumped on the right bandwagon. They're going to be real happy that they were able to push Barack Obama over the top with their shrill messages and condescending assholery.

Sweet merciful Washington:

HBO will televise the celebration, entitled "We Are One," which takes place from 7:00-9:00 p.m. on Sunday, Jan. 18 in Washington. The kickoff event foreshadows a week of activities and celebrations surrounding the inauguration next Tuesday of President-elect Obama.

"We have found that the great artists are eager to take part and each one is working with us to find music that expresses the optimism and hope that people bring to the Obama inauguration," said Michael Stevens, the director of the production.

I may be mistaken, but this may be a sign of the apocalypse.