Barack Obama's Original Inaugural Speech Found

I got an excellent tip from Just Politics about an awesome Obama speech generator. Here's what I got (edited slightly):

My fellow Americans, today is a joetacular day. You have shown the world that "hope" is not just another word for "gluten", and that "change" is not only something we can believe in again, but something we can actually air-guitar.

Today we celebrate, but let there be no mistake – America faces skinny and joe-normous challenges like never before. Our economy is horrifying. Americans can barely afford their mortgages, let alone have enough money left over for Sherman Halls. Our healthcare system is death-defying. If your groinal region is sick and you don't have insurance, you might as well call a Kazakh prostitute. And America's image overseas is tarnished like a Joe's thing Indonesian dictionary. But shooting together we can right this ship, and set a course for SUNY Oneonta.

Finally, I must thank my red family, my awesome campaign volunteers, but most of all, I want to thank college students for making this historic occasion possible. Of course, I must also thank you, President Bush, for years of craving the American people. Without your insane efforts, none of this would have been possible.

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W's Re-Inauguration

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We Need to Give the New President the Benefit of the Doubt

President Barack Obama's first full day of office begins today. Whether we thought he was the right pick for the job, we need to put our country first. We need to make sure that he has the respect of the American people. While we may not like some of the things he's said or done, he has not soiled the office of the President. Thusly, we need to make sure that he has the opportunity to do a good job and make us proud.

He needs our compassion, as he is taking the most difficult job in the world. He will be faced with decisions that could kill thousands, and needs to know that we will not badger him for no reason. Even if he is a great President, there will be times that we will disagree with him. We can't let little things get in the way.

This nation will face hard times over the next four years. Foreign crises and the economy could cause havoc. This is why the new President needs to focus and do his best. He can't have griping on his mind. We've seen the effects of unnecessary assholery. We can't suffer it again. The Republicans did it in the 1990s, when President Clinton should have been focusing on Iraq and bin Laden. Instead, he was mired in impeachment hearings. President Bush was called every name under the book, mainly by those who would believe their IQs so grand that they could decode the genome, while they could not even get through three semesters at college.

So we need to be civil, if nothing else. Even if you believe that President Obama doesn't deserve it, America does.

Aaaargh---

Tomorrow in Schoharie, they're going to be a celebration of the inauguration of President Obama.
From the Tattler.

I don't know if these are out of towners or what, but it appears that they're in the wrong area to attempt to do this. Not to say that they can't, but it seems like just a little bit of gloating that they're willing to do it in the DAR building of all places.

Sometimes there's pride and sometimes there's arrogance. I'm not going, so I can't say which this is.

PS- They want donations. So bring change, you can relieve them.

$150,000,000!

Just a quick article for this Sunday: It is estimated that President-Elect Barack Obama's inauguration will cost more than one hundred fifty million dollars. I have two things I want to point out: first, where's the outrage from those who had a fit when President Bush spent $42.3 Million in 2005 for his inauguration? That's less than a third of the upcoming one. Second, didn't the President-Elect ask us to sacrifice for our shaky economy? Apparently, that does not apply to him.

Celebrities to Make Us Regret Electing Obama at His Own Inauguration

Well, as if the nation doesn't need anything else on its hands. Recession, war, the World Champion Philadelphia Phillies... and now this?

Apparently a bunch of "really smart" celebrities are going to celebrate the fact that they finally jumped on the right bandwagon. They're going to be real happy that they were able to push Barack Obama over the top with their shrill messages and condescending assholery.

Sweet merciful Washington:

HBO will televise the celebration, entitled "We Are One," which takes place from 7:00-9:00 p.m. on Sunday, Jan. 18 in Washington. The kickoff event foreshadows a week of activities and celebrations surrounding the inauguration next Tuesday of President-elect Obama.

"We have found that the great artists are eager to take part and each one is working with us to find music that expresses the optimism and hope that people bring to the Obama inauguration," said Michael Stevens, the director of the production.

I may be mistaken, but this may be a sign of the apocalypse.