Obama Makes His Closing Argument to Fifth Grade Class

Blue Springs, Missouri- In a final stretch until polls close in Missouri later tonight, Democratic Presidental hopeful Barack Obama visited Blue Springs, Missouri to shore up support. Obama toured local small businesses, including a small bakery owned by the McManns, a hardware store owned by a local elderly couple, and M&J's Cafe, a local eatery. Senator Obama also visited Woodrow Wilson Elementary School during lunching hours.

"I'm so glad to be here in a school named after one of our greatest Presidents, who believed every man and woman were equal," Obama said to Mrs. Kamdon's fifth grade class. "Were it not for his divine wisdom, my place in politics, and in society itself would not be what it is. God bless Woodrow Wilson," Obama said of the racist President.

Touring the school, the Senator was made aware of local budgetary restrains that were crippling the school's music and art programs. "Yes, I too have listened to music," Obama was heard telling Mrs. Gravelstein, the K-5 Music Teacher. Finally, Obama went from classroom to classroom giving presentations to students.

"Yes we can, children. We can make Mr. Espers give us less homework. Yes we can. We can make lunchlady Penellopi serve pizza on Tuesdays, Thursdays, and Fridays. Yes we can. We can make the recess aide Mr. Trouser give us more time to play freeze tag. Yes we can. Children, yes we can have fun mandated in school and make everyday happy and joyful, yes we CAN!" Obama, stricken with emotion, collapsed onto young Timothy Phillips' desk, weeping to the point were he had to be escorted out.

As he was walking out, students heard Obama mumble to his aides quietly. "Do you think they heard my words? Do you think they heard," Obama whispered over and over. Visibly shaken, Obama was escorted into his limousine, driving off into the sunset, and a brighter future. -AP