The Definitive List of Women Who are Hotter/Better Looking than Megan Fox: #2

Back for more, are you? After the very successful first list, here comes another batch of women.

Now, I'm not saying that Megan Fox isn't good looking/hot. But what I am saying is that she is not the hottest of the hot that the media makes her out to be. Looking around American TV/Movie/Pop culture, these lovely ladies beat Megan Fox in looks any day of the week. So here are the ladies (that I could think of) that are better looking than Ms. Fox, but don't get quite the hype that she does:

Bar RafaeliKate WinsletMaria SharapovaElisha CuthbertKate Beckinsale

Shana HiattAnd if that isn't enough, here are the beautiful women on the first list:

Yvonne Strahovski
Scarlett Johansson
Olivia WildeElizabeth Hurley
Olivia MunnJennifer Love Hewitt
Catherine Zeta Jones
Salma Hayek
And just to be partisan, Michelle Malkin:
Vote this up on Digg and Reddit

Bookmark our site!

Consider advertising on our site!

Top Halloween Costumes

Dr. Jose Chicoinio M.D. is here to tell you lads what the hottest Halloween costumes are in a top five countdown. We've heard all about people going as President Obama and, what are you kids doing now adays... uh, Walter Cronkite, but here are some even better get-ups.

5. In a hitch, if you don't have any clothes, you can always mutilate yourself for free.
4. An easy way to make blood if you go as a vampire is to put Hawaiian Punch on your mouth. Either that or use real blood.
3. Dress up as if you are invisible. When asked what you are, respond that you are dressed as the jobs the President has created.
2. Go around eating brains. If people ask if you are going around dress up as a zombie, answer honestly: no.
1. If you want your Frankenstein costume to be realistic, it never hurts to graft several limbs to your body in replace of your originals.


Note: Duh, these are fake. If you do them, it's your fault. Happy Halloween.
Bookmark our site!

Consider advertising on our site!

10 Ways to Know Obama is Naive

10. Believes that blaming Republicans for everything makes him bipartisan.
9. Thinks that listening to other people's opinion makes him indecisive.
8. Roots for both the Yankees and Red Sox. Who does that?
7. Presumes that saying he'll have "General Tso's Chicken" at a Chinese restaurant means he speaks Chinese.
6. Argued that smoking in front of his children was a good thing...until he became President.
5. He still blames President Bush for everything, eight months into his Presidency, and for problems he created.
4. Truly accepts that Kim Jong-Il and Mahmud Ahmadinejad are just misguided souls.
3. Thinks Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom is the best Indiana Jones movie.
2. He believes everything the Main Steam Media says about him.
1. He actually thinks that he can pull the wool over the average voters' eyes when it come to partisanship.


Bookmark our site!

Consider advertising on our site!

10 Things Taken Out of the Health Care Bill at the Last Minute

10. Clause allowing 'upgrade' surgery, in which people could become cyborgs or super-strong.
9. The phrase "death panel," which was replaced with "murder committee."
8. So-called 'age limit' of 60 years old.
7. Right of doctors to 'experiment' on sleeping patients.
6. Pay raise for Senators who vote for the bill.
5. Amendment which disallowed Town Hall meetings.
4. Free will.
3. Several pages that called on patients to eat an apple a day.
2. Emergency plans for 'radical right-winged zombies' killed by governmental negligence.
1. Detailed description of what it takes to be a good doctor, including the secret ingredient of 'love.'


Bookmark our site!

Consider advertising on our site!

Obama's Solutions to the Recession

1. Burning a giant pile of money-- oh wait, that's the stimulus bill.
2. Donating his wife's ego to charity.
3. Taking weekends off to save on costs.
4. Leaving us in the dark to save on electricity.
5. Using Rumplestiltskin to spin gold.
6. Closing down government-run insane asylums.
7. Playing the lottery.
8. One really big bet in Vegas.
9. Investing in Iraqi dinars.
10. Putting more people on welfare so that they-- yeah, it makes no sense.
11. Blaming Bush so much that the recession will undo itself.

Consider advertising on our site!
Also, if you need to search anything on Google, please use the bar below:

Why Did You Vote for Obama?

1. I was drunk.
2. Pat Buchanan wasn't running.
3. Acorn gave me $20.
4. I wanted to see the world end before things got boring.
5. I was ready for change-- but then I realized that that would require changing things.
6. His wife has such poise and intellect.
7. I wanted to see Rahm Emanuel in shorts.
8. Cause I desired Al Franken as Chief Justice of the Supreme Court.
9. I didn't vote.
10. I wanted to shut Jon Stewart up.

Consider advertising on our site!
Also, if you need to search anything on Google, please use the bar below:

Signs the End is Near

10. The meteoric rise of World of Warcraft.
9. That one ugly kid in your graduating class who always swore revenge.
8. President Obama's decision to give Iran nuclear weapons in exchange for "ponies."
7. All those people quoting Monty Python.
6. Dick Cheney is hiding in his anti-radiation/furby bunker.
5. This blog.
4. Democrats are trusted again, for some reason.
3. Televangelists.
2. Remember that time when you saw that homeless man and you didn't give him money? Yeah-- you'd better cause you're going to fry for that.
1. The Pope building a strangely large ark.

Consider advertising on our site!
Also, if you need to search anything on Google, please use the bar below:

10 Things to Do to Avoid Swine Flu

10. Do not make out with a pig.
9. Do not put lipstick on a pig.
8. Do not call Sarah Palin a 'pig with lipstick.'
7. Despite personal leanings, avoid at all costs eating pig feces.
6. Avoid opening an animal farm with pigs named Napoleon and Snowball.
5. Convert to Judaism or Islam.
4. Talk to Old McDonald about his pigs with an oink-oink here AND an oink-oink there.
3. Avoid eating people who died of swine flu.
2. Do not associate with 'capitalist pigs.'
1. Just do whatever the government tells you.

Also, take all the drugs you can find, whether or not they're vaccines.

Disclaimer: Do not do these.

Consider advertising on our site!
Also, if you need to search anything on Google, please use the bar below:

Jumping in Pools: Top 10 Cool Countries

I've decided to start a new feature on the blog and all of our writers are encouraged to chime in with their own articles. This time I'll start it off with some of the cooler countries that I like and why. The US is, of course, number one, so we'll skip us for now.

1. Kurdistan: Having put up with 25 years of the rule of Saddam Hussein, the fascist government in Syria, repressive Turkey, and the theocrats in Iran, these people are resilient. While Muslim, they are surprisingly secular and definitely tolerant, sheltering Yezidis and Christians from al Qaeda terrorists. Iraqi Kurds are also the most pro-American people on the planet and fight side-by-side with our forces in Baghdad.

2., 3. Albania and Kosovo: Pro-American and democratic, these poor nations are eager to help spread democracy throughout the world. Albania just joined NATO and has sent troops to Afghanistan, Iraq, and Darfur to help stop the spread of Islamic extremism. Albania warmly welcomed President Bush during his visit there and is a secular Islamic nation.

4. India: The world's most populous democracy, this nation has moved closer to the United States in the last eight years. Friendly also with Israel, the nation is one of the few in the world with a slim history of anti-Semitism. Tolerant and on the forefront of the War on Terrorism, this nation is one that just screams awesome. India is also sending rockets into space now and may beat us back to the moon.

5. Israel: One of the most berated nations, Israel's democracy is tolerant, despite having hundreds of millions of people wanting to wipe it out. Israel proudly takes on fasicst and theocratic forces, like Saddam's Iraq, Hamas, Hezbollah, and the Islamic Republic of Iran. This nation is one of our closest allies and deserves much more credit than it gets.

6. Georgia: This small country is one of the most pro-America on the planet. Georgia is pushing to join NATO and sent 2,000 troops to Iraq. Georgia also offered 500 to Afghanistan. Unfortunately, Russia's brutal and unjustified attack last August has decimated the nation's infrastructure and military and Russia's dictatorship is actively seeking to topple the Western-backed democracy.

7. Colombia: A democracy that has fought off narco-terrorism, Colombia is the United States' cheif ally in South America. A hedge against Venezuela, this nation is planning to send over 100 troops to Afghanistan. Thanks in large part to President Bush's dedication, Colombia ended much of its fighting with drug traffickers and communist guerrillas.

8. Poland: One of America's top allies in Europe, this nation suffered at the hands of Hitler and Stalin. From the ashes of the Cold War, this former Warsaw Pact nation is a leader in the fight against terrorism. Sending 2,500 troops to Iraq and over 1,000 to Afghanistan, Poland is looking to avoid the mistakes of the past. Poland is also integral to American interests in Eastern Europe, especially when dealing with Russia.

9. The Ukraine: The breadbasket of Europe, this populous democracy has shone as a US ally. Although Russia is pressing on the democratic government, the people have not conceded. Despite Russia poisoning presidential candidate Victor Yushenko in 2004 and rigging the elections, the people rose up and demanded a new vote.

10. Mongolia: Yes, the former home of Genghis Khan, this remote nation between Russia and China has positioned itself in the US bloc. Sending troops to Iraq and Afghanistan, Mongolia is looking to rebuild after about 70 years of Communist rule. Mongolia warmly welcomed President Bush's visit several years ago.

Bonus Country: Yes, Britain should be on this list, but it's too obvious. Australia is America's tough brother who always seems to be there for us. The Aussies sent troops to Korea and 'Nam, as well as to Iraq and Afghanistan, where they served with distinction. Australia's a venerable democracy who's looking to help its neighbors, especially with its intervention in East Timor.

Consider advertising on our site!
Also, if you need to search anything on Google, please use the bar below:

10 Reasons Why Family Guy Has Sucked for Four Years

10. Instead of trying to be funny, it just tries to be outrageous. Funny, huh?
9. Liberal slant. Do I have to say more?
8. Why is Peter an unbelievable moron now, instead of being kind of stupid with no common sense?
7. Half of comedy is the delivery of the joke. When there is no joke and you can't deliver it, well, that doesn't end well.
6. Instead of being smart-stupid with jokes, the show is now just stupid-stupid.
5. Hey, remember when Family Guy had original plots? Yeah, neither do I.
4. Long, unfunny jokes that seem to go on forever.
3. I'm just gonna go ahead and assume that Family Guy has different writers after their hiatus.
2. Yes, we all know that Seth McFarlane loves himself, but do we to see it in every episode?
1. Isn't a comedy show supposed to be funny?


Consider advertising on our site!
Also, if you need to search anything on Google, please use the bar below:

10 Tips to Run for Office

Dr. Joe, being the Chief Justice on the Supreme Court of the State of Alabama, would like to present you with some surefire tips to gain traction in the political world.

1. Speak extra-slowly, so the dumber constituents will understand.
2. Do not kiss babies, they might have germs.
3. Campaign on the 'will only lie to you three times a day' line.
4. Don't run as a Communist or National Socialist.
5. Keep pro-Stalin comments to a minimum.
6. Call your opponent a 'felon'.
7. Show your support for the NRA by showing a gun at the State Legislature.
8. Remind the voters that the end is nigh, unless you are elected.
9. Divorce your wife, so it's technically not an affair.
10. Speak only in Swedish.

Consider advertising on our site!
Also, if you need to search anything on Google, please use the bar below:

10 Things President Bush Does, Now That He has Free Time

10. Laughing his ass off that he doesn't have to deal with this crap any more.
9. Sailing on his boat "the Crusader."
8. Surfing the internets.
7. Travelling abroad to countries that like him: Albania and Georgia.
6. Sleeping days at a time, hunting deer with AK47s, and cutting down trees with karate chops.
5. Planting “Don’t mess with Texas” signs throughout his lawn.
4. Playing Rock ‘em Sock ‘em Robots with his brother.
3. Going to sleep-overs with Donald Rumsfeld and Condi Rice.
2. Trying to expect the Spanish Inquisition.
1. Listening to Coast to Coast a.m., realizing President Obama is a lizardman, moving to Canada.


Consider advertising on our site!
Also, if you need to search anything on Google, please use the bar below:

Signs that the Recession is Bad...

10. Bill Gates sold his Lamborghini for a Geo.
9. Obama has been told to ration his "Uhhh"s
8. We are running dangerously low on our national stockpile of funk.
7. Obama's betting $50 billion in Vegas this weekend.
6. Money is so tight, Congress gave itself a raise.
5. Rich New Englanders contemplating feeling bad for the poor.
4. Democrats decide to only spend $830 billion in wasteful spending this year.
3. Obama is filmed during a press conference falling to his knees and shouting, "WHY!?"
2. Tim Geithner works the night shift at McDonald's.
1. Californians have again taken to "California Cheeseburgers."

Consider advertising on our site!
Also, if you need to search anything on Google, please use the bar below:

Causes of the Great Recession

10. 2007's biggest fad of burning massive piles of cash.
9. Senator Robert Byrd (D-WV) successfully lobbying the government for $50 million in white sheets.
8. Stupidity.
7. Every time Obama says "Um..." the Dow tanks 200 points.
6. By 2006, Britney Spears and Hannah Montana accounted for 20% of our GDP.
5. Umm... we don't make things any more.
4. The tragic events of 11/4/2008.
3. Chevy introducing an SUV that got 4 gallons per mile.
2. FCC instituted $50 fine someone texted omg, lol, or rofl.
1. Did I say stupidity?


Consider advertising on our site!
Also, if you need to search anything on Google, please use the bar below:

Jumping in Pools's List of the Five Greatest Video Games of All Time (That We've Played)

Since everyone seems to be in the mood to do lists, here's another one.

5. Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas (PS2)
4. Fallout 2 (PC)
3. Max Payne (Multi-Platform)
2. Civilization II (PC)
1. Final Fantasy VII (Original Playstation)


Honorable Mention: Goldeneye 64 (Nintendo 64)

Consider advertising on our site!
Also, if you need to search anything on Google, please use the bar below:

Other Names for the Stimulus Bill

1. Creating bankruptcy to avoid bankruptcy.
2. Let's spend our way out of debt!
3. You've got to be kidding.
4. I failed economics 101.
5. We can blame this one on the Special Olympics, too, right?
6. I never took economics 101.
7. AIG needs more money, right?
8. The national budget suicide plan of 2009.
9. Yikes.
10. Get out that fiddle.

Consider advertising on our site!
Also, if you need to search anything on Google, please use the bar below:

10 More Dating Tips From Dr. Joe, Love Guru

10. Always nod your head and agree whatever the woman says; they like that sort of stuff.
9. Try not to reveal that you have no tounge until the second date.
8. It is not wise to tell your date that you are "Bitchin'" in bed within the first five minutes.
7. Whatever you do, do not, ever, pay for your meal. Always ask if the girl would like to split the tab, because it shows that you don't want to make decisions without her.
6. Do not bring up your fascination with Dungeons and Dragons and Star Wars under any circumstances.
5. Be loose and play practical jokes on your date, such as unscrewing the salt shaker, or tripping her down a metal flight of stairs.
4. Always laugh at what your date says, regardless of how unfunny it is. Even the stuff about her mother dying in a car accident just a week and a half ago.
3. Show off your manliness by threatening to beat up other, smaller men who have been “eyin’ your lady.”
2. Try not to go up to your date, smile, and ask, “Very nice, how much?”
1. Be a gentleman and be polite. Always ask to open things for her, like a door or a bottle. Do not, however, ask her if she could “open your pants.”

Consider advertising on our site!
Also, if you need to search anything on Google, please use the bar below:

Good Things About the Obama Presidency

1. If you're one of 95% of Americans, you will receive up to 10 cents in tax breaks.
2. If you're poor, you won't feel as alone in four years.
3. You may still have your home.
4. The bailouts mean that if you are an AIG executive, you get a lot more cash for crashing the company.
5. Your McCain bumper sticker will attract women.
6. Jindal 2012.
7. You can take a wheelbarrow full of money to get a loaf of bread. Think of the exercise!
8. The economic downturn causes you to-- all right, you're screwed.
9. Not going out because you have no money decreases the chances you'll get mugged.
10. You finally get to say, "I told you so."

Consider advertising on our site!
Also, if you need to search anything on Google, please use the bar below:

More Potential Catchphrases for the Obama Presidency

1. Oops.
2. It could be worse, couldn't it?
3. America, now 40% off!
4. The pre-Jindal Administration.
5. Shinier than on TV.
6. No, you can't get a refund.
7. Dissent is now unpatriotic.
8. Statist and proud since 2009.
9. America, home of the disappearing budget!
10. Try us for four years. If you're not satisfied, you're a fascist.

Consider advertising on our site!
Also, if you need to search anything on Google, please use the bar below:

10 Other Things You Did Not Know About President Obama

10. Is considered the best President since George W. Bush.
9. Always checks to make sure his tires are inflated on Air Force One to get better gas milage.
8. Has two daughters whose future he's ruining with over-spending.
7. Originally thought the "Stimulus Bill" had nothing to do with money.
6. Is an expert at playing the world's smallest violin.
5. Speaks fluent English, Spanish, Italian, and Teleprompter.
4. Can read and control minds with his good looks.
3. Secretly wished that when he promised "Change" that people would think he meant several quarters.
2. Once thought the country of Hungary was full of hungry people.
1. Hopes that the Congress will accept his new plan for Afghanistan: sending in Chuck Norris.

Consider advertising on our site!
Also, if you need to search anything on Google, please use the bar below: