Sunday, July 26, 2009

Biden, Obama to have Gaffe-Off

WASHINGTON- In order to quell the fire over his remarks on the police officers that arrested Professor Gates, President Barack Obama and VP Joe Biden have scheduled their first Gaffe-Off.

The event, planned for August 15th, is to be located at Madison Square Garden in New York. The meeting is the first of its kind, and will feature old gaffes by the Administration mixed in with the new.

"It's sort of like boxing," said Press Secretary Robert Gibbs. "There will be a panel of judges, scoring how the participants do. There can be clean gaffes, counter-gaffes, and hay-gaffers.

"Counter-gaffes are where one competitor states a gaffe that he has made, and his opponent states a similar gaffe, but one with bigger or worse consequences. For example, if Joe Biden references when he asked a handicapped man to stand up, the President could counter that with his comment about bowling like an athlete in the Special Olympics, since they both deal with physical activities.

"It's a lot of fun," Gibbs concluded.

Strategies for the duel are unclear, but House Speaker Nancy Pelosi had some ideas. "I really expect President Obama to hammer Joe early. A right with 'the officers who arrested Gates acted stupidly' and a quick left with 'if we pass the stimulus, unemployment will not rise above eight percent.'

"But, of course, I wouldn't count Joe out. I mean, he's great at making fun of Obama, like saying that 'Obama can't do anything without a teleprompter.' And if he's in trouble, he might drop the F-Bomb.

"I can't wait for this," said Pelosi. "I haven't been this excited since I made Joe's Babe of the Week."

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