What the Revelations from the New York Times Could Be (Humor)

According to sources, the New York Times is putting finishing touches on a major scandal involving New York Governor David Patterson. Though the details are scarce, we here at Jumping in Pools are speculating what indeed those revelations could be. Please note that these are all speculative, and not necessarily based on hard evidence. Also note that these are supposed to be humorous, so do not be offended.

Possible Humorous Revelations:

Possibility #1: Patterson created the deficit in New York state to fund a nuclear weapon.

Possibility #2: Governor Patterson is not blind and has been faking it his entire life.

Possibility #3: The governor is finally going to stop Seth MacFarlane from ever making a new show again (God I hope so).

Possibility #4: Patterson is stepping down to host his own Reality Show, in which unexpectant participants are thrust into situations that they are not qualified for.

Possibility #5: Patterson will be forced to admit that he once visited upstate New York.

Possibility #6: Dear God, I hope it's the one about stopping Seth MacFarlane.

Be sure to check out our serious predictions.

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